INTRODUCTION

Why I have chosen this topic?

The reason why I have chosen the topic “Arranged marriages” is because I found it very interesting learning about different cultures. Arranged marriages are often because of traditions, religion and culture that occur mainly in the Middle-East. I would focus on arrange marriages in Japan, India and Africa.

What has seized my attention is the difference with my culture. It is not common in my culture to occur arranged marriages so I found it really interesting. Arranged marriages can have some advantages and disadvantages. This issue has people in favor and some people that disagree completely; it is a very complex topic with different perspectives.

There are also different perspectives for those involved in the arranged marriage. For example, the girls are the most affected, while the parents are the benefited.

With this work I would like to learn about these interesting and different cultures. I would look at the requirements for an arranged marriage and I would also look at the past and the present scenario of this topic.

GLOBAL PERSPECTIVES

Arranged marriages have been an interesting topic for centuries. A love marriage is considered as dangerous and forbidden while an arranged marriage is the safe way to ensure you family’s approval.

Usually young people, in countries that arranged marriages are common, are told from an early age that there partner would be chose for them. If someone denies an arranged marriage it is seen as a sign of disrespect towards the family.

Commonly, the most significant aspect of choosing a suitable spouse is the bond between the two families, rather than the relationship between the couple.
Opinions tend to differ about this topic, but statistics lay the divorce rate for arranged marriages much lower than the love marriages. However, it is also said that in an arranged marriage a divorce is often not an option because of the pressure from families and society.

We can say that the affected ones are the girls because they are pressured to get married. They are forced to live with a stranger and marry him without love. Sometimes the girls are forced by the family to have children to show society that they are a good happy family. Often that child grows up unhappy because their parents don’t get along and fight very often.

Advantages of arranged marriages

Most of the arranged marriages are often successful for some reasons. The first reason is that the parents do support the relationship. They like everything from their child’s spouse because they have chosen him and in some way it’s their responsibility to maintain the relationship working.
Arranged marriages are good for those who believe strongly in astrology and horoscope. Some marriages have grown really good after getting married and vice versa. In an arranged marriage, both the girl and the boy will be from the same religion and caste, so they would have the same lifestyle, food and culture.

Disadvantages of arranged marriages

Imagine all of a sudden you start your life with a person that you hardly even know. The couple that is getting married may not like each other or even know each other but they must marry because their parents have decided. Normally girls accept this because they believe it’s part of their fate and their parents are happy with this.

IN MY COUNTRY

In my country, arranged marriages are not common of our culture. So when we heard stories about arranged marriages in other countries, we find it very interesting and sometimes impossible to believe. Peru’s culture can be extremely different from India’s or Africa’s culture, that’s what makes this topic very attractive.

In Peru, love marriages are the most common and we can find very few cases of arranged marriages. Arranged marriages are more common in upper social clases to unite families bonds and get benefits from it.

In my family, there have not been any arranged marriages. It is not common to occur because our culture and traditions does not believe in fixing marriages, our culture believes that love marriages are more efficient and people have the right to choose their spouses.

JAPANESE ARRANGED MARRIAGES

Arranged marriages in Japan are called Miai. It is estimated that between 10-30% of marriages in Japan are arranged. The participants of Miai are those who are to potentially be married. The candidates and their families are judged on a large set of criteria to determine the balance between the marriage. This includes level of education, income, occupation, physical attractiveness, religion, social standing, and hobbies. The participant’s bloodline is also very important because they are afraid the blood would be infected. Ideally, the couple should be from an equal social status.

Nakōdo

A Nakōdo role is to go between families in the miai process. There purpose is to introduce people entering a new arrangement and assist shy candidates. They must introduce potential candidates and families to each other. Then they provide liaison for the two families. This role helps to avoid differences in opinions between the families by serving as an intermediary for working out the details of the marriage. In return they are giving a percentage (10%) of the money the broom gives to the bride.

Selection process

The initiative for the miai process often comes from the parents, who feel that their son or daughter is in a marriageable age, usually between 22 and 30. Parents would interpose the phrase “onegai shimasu” which means “I make the request” into conversations. With this, people are aware that they consented that their daughter may meet a man. The daughter may not be aware that his parents are suggesting her availability. After this, the Nakodo would have photographs of the candidate and a “rirekisho”, a small personal history. The rirekisho commonly includes the name, age, health, education, occupation and marital status of all members of the candidate’s family. The families would sit down with the Nakodo and look at the portfolios to eliminate inappropriate candidates. The daughter and the mother would make a list of the primary choices and ask the Nakodo to investigate the first choice.

INDIA ARRANGED MARRIAGES

Arranged marriages have been the tradition in Indian society for centuries. Even today a big majority of Indians have their marriages planned by their parents. Arranged marriages are made after taking in consideration factors such as age, height, personal values and tastes, the backgrounds of their families and their castes and the astrological compatibility of the couples' horoscope. The institution of marriage in India is considered a very important one.

The parents feel that because they are wiser than their son or daughter so they would be able to find a suitable match for their children with more prudence. Although most marriages are arranged in India, some people do chose select their partners but even this love marriages in India generally happen with the approval of the parents. For the Indians, a marriage is thought to be for life and divorce rate is very low. 1.1% results in a divorce. An arranged marriage is the result of a wide search by both the girl’s and the boy’s family, this means the check for compatibility without using emotions.

Factors that are considered generally in Indian marriages to search for compatibility:

• Values and personal expectations should be similar
• The girl should be younger and shorter than the boy
• The boy and the girl should be from the same religion
• Diet (veg/non-veg/alcohol/smoking): may differ only if acceptable to the other
• Similar educational levels or the boy should be more educated than the girl
• Boy's current and future financial situation should be acceptable to the girl


The parents generally discuss their expectations with their son or daughter before starting to look after a match. Expectations are shared with relatives and family friends who can bring suggestions. Once the parents from both the bride and the groom have agreed, they must have a witness for the girl and the boy. The date is fixed according to the bride and the grooms horoscope and astrologically auspicious day. Then in the name of god, both families exchange fruits and cloths as a symbol of happy acceptance.

AFRICA ARRANGED MARRIAGES

The role of tribes and family is very important in African traditions of marriage. Most of the marriages are arranged by the family of the marrying partners. Women are considered so valuable that the husbands are traditionally request to give some gift to the family of the bride. The noble families consider it honorable to have arranged marriages of their children. The tradition has cemented the communities to have good partners for their children.

Poor families permit their children to select their life partners. Even them try to select the best spouse on their likings and disliking. They don’t allow their family to get involved unnecessarily.

Why is it like this?

Children from rich and nobles families often depend upon their parents for a long time until they establish their own recognition. On the other hand, children from the poor families have to struggle from a very young age. They rarely have to depend upon their families; they have to struggle for their survival which makes them free from the problem of recognition.

The African traditions of marriage are a collection of diverse customs and events; influence of Islam, Christianity and Western society is evident.

WHAT IS AN ARRANGED MARRIAGE?

An arranged marriage is done when the marriage depends on the decision of the parents of both spouses. The couple usually has to get along because of what their families want, arranged marriages is all about creating family alliances. In this situation, love is not important; it is all about money and who has higher authority in society.

The ones that are getting married must get along or suffer by living with a complete estranger for the rest of their lives for their families’ reputation. Nowadays, things are changing and people are starting to rebel and fight for who they want to marry; some succeed but commonly they fail.

MY PERSONAL PERSPECTIVE

I think that arranged marriages are based on traditions and culture and they must be respected. Nobody knows the real reason why the family is taking the decision of making her son or daughter marry a selective spouse.

I believe that people who disagree completely with arranged marriages are fearful of the unknown, they don’t agree because is an issue not common in many parts of the world. On the other hand, the families that believe in arranged marriages is because the union would usually benefit them and their reputation.

Yes, indeed it can have some disadvantages like having to live with an estranger or not marrying who you want but there are also some advantages like lower divorce rate. I believe that every culture have it's own traditions and they should be respected whether it is wrong or right.

I believe that in the future, arranged marriages would dissapear because they would be prohibited by the law. Arranged marriages would not be accepted, neither as a tradition or culture issue because it is seen as an abuse to the human rights.

Possible scenarios

In the future there would be still arranged marriages by the fact that is a tradition of cultures although every time is getting less popular around the world. Some countries have very strong beliefs which would prolong the tradition of arranged marriages while others are more flexible and adapt to the develop of the society.

Courses of action

Arranged marriages are considered a tradition therefore people like us can’t do much about it. Nevertheless, if the country is not happy with this tradition and wants to stop it they can teach young children that arranged marriages are not good so in the next years the amount of marriages would be reduce. Unfortunately, there are still many people who belief in this tradition and they would teach it to their children so it would prolong it.

SOURCES

http://ezinearticles.com/?The-Reality-of-Arranged-Marriages&id=606

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Miai

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Arranged_marriage_in_India

http://www.muslim-marriage-guide.com/african-traditions.html

http://weddings.iloveindia.com/features/arranged-marriages.html

http://www.kisaso.com/love-marriage-and-arranged-marriage-advantages-and-disadvantages/